Imaginary Interview With Al Mighty

Lou: I want to welcome the most-esteemed guest we’ve ever had. I can’t see you, but I understand your English perfectly although there are traces of several hundred accents.  

Al: Some accents you’ll recognize and some you will not. Thank you for having me, I am happy to be here and answer any questions.  

Lou: My sister always wanted to know if you’re a man or a woman?  

Al: It would be politically incorrect to declare one or the other.  

Lou: OK, let’s get started. The election in the United States is on everyone’s mind. Can you tell which candidate will win?  

Al: Such triviality. There are over a billion people each in India, China and Africa comprising nearly half the world’s population many of whom are living in dire poverty and have little concern about who might reside in the White House? Do you think the comical and arrogant display of perfunctory vilification each candidate rains upon the other during the presidential election in the United States has any relevance to the betterment of the global community?   The result will be that in the United States the lucky 51% that managed to pick the winner will diligently work to ignore or marginalize the 49% that chose the loser. The impact on things that matter will be negligible. Lou, you need to ask better questions.  

Lou: That doesn’t paint a very pretty picture locally or globally.  

Al: It’s the same everywhere. People who lack purpose and strong values believe politicians can light a path to some sort of moral salvation while in places through-out the world innocent people are being slaughtered daily and the murderers are hailed as heroes. The only difference since the dawn of time being Neanderthals used sticks and stones and today there’s machetes, drones and RPG’s. This marking of territory is akin to how the animals behave. Lou, do you support a politician that endorses this behavior or one that ignores it?  

Lou: Is there any chance of coexistence in the world?  

Al: Global coexistence must begin with personal harmony and with a sense of inner responsibility. But to what extent does an individual or family’s sense of responsibility extend to other families, tribes, nations or the entire world? Simply, does an individual’s personal responsibility extend to something larger? Sharing one’s abundance or sharing even if one is barely surviving, in both cases without motive, are both lessons for children. Compare the values that are taught to children in a primitive African tribe to those being taught at an elementary school in Los Angeles or New York.  

Lou: Haven’t there been examples of harmony in the past?  

Al: A peaceful tribe may have lived at the edge of a forest and enjoyed a tranquil life, but eventually they faced death, slavery, cannibalism or other horrors at the hands of others who perceived humanity differently. Peace is generally of short duration; tribes that at some moment in time were the eaters will always become the eaten.  

Lou: Maybe the world was not meant for coexistence, because friction begets action and action accomplishes goals.  

Al: And the physical result of too much friction is obvious especially if the goals are greed and avarice. If the entire memory or every difference of opinion or conflict were erased from the minds of every individual on earth leaving them without prejudices or anger, how long would it take for new conflicts to incubate?  

Lou: This picture is getting worse. Anything positive in the future?  

Al: I do not provide political or social commentary but from current circumstances the world is heading towards a modern dark age but because of technological advances the period of time in darkness will be compressed. On the positive side, the Renaissance emerged from the Dark Ages and that changed the world again or “Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, she became a butterfly.” Someone posted that quote on a gay website.  

Lou: Can you be more specific about the future state of the world?  

Al: No asteroids or meteorites are going to collide with the earth – that’s a good piece of information. The world’s population will peak in 2050 and begin to decline as women from underdeveloped countries will refuse servitude as baby factories. That will take the pressure off of natural and edible resources. The enlightenment from the dark age will be allocation of resources and the formulas to accomplish that goal. Some people will become enriched and others will be left behind but those left behind will not resemble those left behind today because global nano-coins will serve as the great equalizer.  

Lou: Will a great leader emerge?  

Al: Most leaders through-out history that are remembered or idolized believed their path to immortality is to take everything possible away from other people, but I assume you mean a spiritual leader.  

Lou: Yes, of course a spiritual leader.  

Al: Does one need a spiritual leader to be taught the difference between right and wrong, between peace and anger or between generosity and selfishness?  

Lou: Probably not, but on that topic are the Jews the “Chosen People?”  

Al: They must be because they continually get chosen.  

Lou: OK, What about the Ten Commandments?  

Al: Do you mean the ones that were removed from the Alabama Courthouse by the ACLU?  

Lou: No, the original ones gifted to Moses. There’s nothing in the Ten Commandments about sharing.  

Al: “Thou shall not covet” is meant that one should be free of envy or desire which only causes personal strife and is the fountain of all iniquity. The opposite of covet is to be generous. By the way, I understand you’ve had some personal lapses with number 7 – the adultery one.  

Lou: You do seem to keep track.  

Al: Its part of my job.  

Lou: Before you go can you tell me the secret of life?  

Al: At all times, impact those around you in a positive way, in turn, you will be impacted positively.  

Lou: Is it that simple?  Wait, are you still there – where did you go? I believe the interview for today is over.